When you are trying to buy an expensive home-gym gear or nutritious pills or perhaps more materialistic
like a laptop or good woody table, it is imperative to not focus much on cost but rather on the value
it gets to you.
A good note-taking app subscription despite being expensive can get your work organized and lessen your
time in producing content. Hiring a freelancer for some bucks to get video edited or enhance marketing
will bring great value to work.
Billionaire buys a pinching-on-pocket private jet to save time and avoid useless airplane chit-chats/selfies/airport
bureaucratic nightmares.
Thinkers and thought leaders attend pricy seminars/sessions and pay more than market rates for private guidance
from experts in their field. Yes, it is on the big-budget end, however, they might get a new startup idea or unlock
new ways of thinking to promote their business.
These 5 Rules changed “How I see the world.”
Some pills are hard to swallow but only once they get into the system can we grow high in life. We all want to touch the sky and get into that 1% league, for that more than anything we need to first embrace their mindset and then the skill set, heart set, and spirit set, as Robin Sharma puts it in his “5 A.M.Club.”
These truths are not for doubters but for ready embracers who are willing to find their “Ikigai” in life and get unstuck of the rut they are in.
They are discomforting to the core and can unleash mental rewiring.
Nonetheless, if you are someone who can and want to endure short-term pain for long-term pleasure, then they are for you.
- 1) You should be able to handle the criticism.
Nicholas Klein, a trade union activist, said in a 1918 speech, saying, “First they ignore you. Then they ridicule you. And then they attack you and want to burn you. And then they build monuments for you.”
The world is full of Skeletors who want to pull you down no matter what you do. It’s a lifelong tussle and hassle that never stops. Get this into your head—you will be judged even when you do the noblest of things in the universe.
Even if people don’t do that, circumstances will belittle you. Bad finances, bad health, and unsupportive partners all come like a storm ready to lift off your pale foundations.
Your baby steps will be hunted down and stopped like highway patrol police. You want to chase your dream but your boss nags you with deadlines that don’t matter.
No, energy will not support you either. You are not a sun to constantly get the support of photons to shine on. And you won’t find any ladder that can pull you up.
The fact is this B.S. doesn’t stop and you should bury this truth deep down in your neural space. The law is—things get worse and worse just at the time when you feel that things are getting a little better.
The good thing is you are not alone and you never will be. Even Buddha had got meditation issues. So when you can’t justify that headspace subscription, don’t worry.
Johnwick has them, Thor has them, and Thanos had them. They all struggled and are struggling to get what they want.
Your job is simply to find a way around, find that little start around that problem. This is not idealism but very very practical. No matter what, it’s your job and your job alone to pull off that rose-tinted glasses and search for a solution like Tintin or Sherlock.
This is easy once know that—
1)Storms come at you
2)I should not be surprised
3)I Simply need that one way out and one hook that I can hang on to.
Look, it’s a skill that we master over time. You need to be aware of this. Only after the Nth time we get knocked down, do we scrape the surface of it.
Put that helmet on and you will be safe.
- 2)Idealism happen to exist only in books.
You never get to choose in life. I’m not talking about your coffee or clothing choices but the life-changing ones, if you know what I mean.
You prepare for the test but the questions are off the chart. You do an all-nighter yet the presentation doesn’t impress the clients.
You think merit alone matters but injustice waits around the corner wearing many hats—racism, harassment, and whatnot.
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” That’s Lao Tzu for you. Yes, the old man got the message.
Accepting what is, is not some esoteric-philosophical-fresh from self-help book wisdom. The point is you cannot do anything else.
Yes, we need more money in the account. That’s not happening anytime soon. Yes, you were promised a promotion but it slipped away. And Yes, you of all people deserve a big success but I’m tired of using buts here.
It’s more than clear now that reality differs from movies and fairy tales.
Chris got it in “The pursuit of happiness” finally, however, it’s not for us.
What should we do—save the ranting for yourselves and save the mental energy. Whining and Weeping hard only makes things worse.
1)Correct flaws, if any.
2)Wait for the next opportunity.
3)Stick for a long time. In other words, the “Persistence.”
- 3)Messiah is not coming for you.
Mentors won’t come for you. The dream job won’t fall in your lap and no leader or government will come to save your little ass.
As Winston Churchill remarks—the price of greatness is responsibility.
No Jesus is coming out to change these bad fates for you. It’s been 2020 years and that’s long enough proof for you.
The employer won’t magically recognize your work and give that raise that you’ve been eye-balling. The point is you alone are responsible for your growth. No devil demon is haunting you and no sweet angel wants to help you either.
Accepting this is kind of liberating. And no need to search for blame-shifting. Recognize that you are the trouble maker and it’s you who sabotaged it.
“Only you can pull yourself off the hell.”
- 4)Regrets kill you, like for real.
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves – regret for the past and fear of the future.”—Fulton Oursler.
This self-crucifixion doesn’t move the needle much. Yes, you couldn’t put the efforts that were needed into that job interview and yes, you couldn’t read much when you were supposed to in college.
But that shit happened like aeons ago and you’re still pity-partying over it. Now, that kills your now and future. Do you really think your ideals made this far without mistakes? Are you really that naive?
No one rejected you, they rejected your idea in that sales pitch. No one said “No”, they said “No” only to your mediocre version. How you handle it depends entirely and almost entirely on your ego.
Use the rejection to bring out the best in you.
- 5)Luck never finds you, at least not in my case.
“Diligence is the mother of good luck.”—Benjamin Franklin
Only by regularly working and knocking on every damn door you can find makes you lucky. This means getting lucky is some very ass-hardening stuff.
Newton saw the apple and could find gravitational stuff only because he’s been into it for years and aha-moment came to him when that red thing fell on his head. That’s it, I promise you there’s no divine intervention here.
Inspiration comes only through perspiration. So, don’t get fooled when someone utters the word inspiration from their shiny mouth.
it’s very logical if you can wrap your head around it.
Blogging ideas come only when you constantly blog. The interview offers come only when you apply for lots of them and do your networking thing.
Finally, I leave this hard burning quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson so that your hearts never find sleep
“Shallow men believe in luck or in circumstance. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”
5 Big Ideas from Dhammapada
Well, I guess Buddha A.K.A Siddhartha Gautama doesn’t need any introduction. The rich brat ran away at the age of 29 to seek spiritual wisdom in the forests. As the story goes, by 35, he pretty much did the job and found what he wanted deep within him under the shade of a Bodhi tree. Then he gave talks to people and went wherever he could. These pearls of knowledge were collected as Dhammapada and are now helping millions of urban hippies who are wishing to burn the inner torch.
Here are few of them that might cool your inner valleys —
1)The Noble Minds have stillness.
The wise ones not just according to Buddha alone have stillness in their minds. This is referred to as “Sthitaprajna” in Bhagavad Gita. As Upekkha in Buddhism. And as equanimity in western books. Whatever the word, the essence is the same. The mind is a rock, not some wild horse chasing all the fantasies of grasslands.
2)Avoid the company of immature.
There’s a harsh truth in these words. In fact, his fellow spiritual flower Rumi also confirms this when he advises us only to hang out with supporting mates. And the Stoic legend Seneca even goes a bit further and strictly says to retire into ourselves as much as possible or the next best is to associate with the ones who improve you. This is because when we hang out with rotten minds, the infection soon spreads like Albert Camus’s Plague. Or they belittle your passions and dreams which makes the realization an impossible event.
More dreams are killed in the companionship of fools than in failures. No wonder people say that you are the average of five people you spend time with.
3)Desires Kill you whether you see it or not.
Buddha calls desire the primary evil. This is because it is the ultimate happiness killer. you become a slave to a thing or a person when desire enters into the picture. Any sort of attachment or condition invariably brings in disappointments that anchor you down. I get that. How is it possible not to have desires in this materialistic world when everything is a competition?
The answer is plain and simple. you die regardless of what you accumulate. unless you come out of this rut and realize the “self” within, there’s no way out.
Thomas Jefferson understood this when he said — “ Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condition of life in which chance has placed us, but is always the result of good conscience, good health, occupation and freedom in all pursuits.”
4)Self Mastery is Important
Conquering yourself is the hardest thing in the mind. In fact, it is easy to occupy an empire with a disciplined empire but to obtain control over self like the philosopher-king Marcus Aurelius is hard. Hence he did that journal thing to reflect on one’s own faults and craft a better person.
Yes, it takes time but you should not give up and let suffering or ignorance comes in the way. Listen to what Robert Greene has to say about this —
“ Mastery is not a function of genius or talent. its is a function of time and intense focus applied to a particular field.”
5)Now is the time to wake up
No, there’s no magic pill that lets you live forever. There’s no time for ifs and buts. This moment is the time for all you want to do in this life. Rescheduling, postponements, delays, and suspensions are for gods not for mortals like us. Every opportunity or chance that life offers has a seed that will give a chance to grow. If you say no, then you are skipping the advancement of your life. Listen when Thomas Hobbes says that human life is nasty and short.
Do not hold back yourself. Everything will soon end and all the mistakes will be forgiven by time. But before that happens —
“Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary.” May the gods be envious of your life.
Exit strategy
Over the years, I learned that it is best to first devise an exit strategy, a plan to come out of a disaster
we are stuck in, be it medicinal or mental, financial or philosophical, than to do pity-partying. We can
later curse the fates or gods or some “xyz” person who caused it but first think of a road map to jump
out of the mess.
Prepare that and later think about the sad story that you want to drown in.
Decision
Often we analyze before taking a decision. For instance, if we want to buy a house, it goes something
like this – What is the right price? Where should we buy it? Is it the right price?, How about the
neighborhood? Does it have a good park nearby?, or Is it connected to public transportation?
and so on. This is well and good but we neglect the post-decision analysis.
After taking the decision, regardless of whether it was a successful choice or not, we need to sit down
and do the thinking about it. Did we get the desired result? Why not? How did we miss? or What factors
made it a smart choice? Noting down answers to these can help us repeat successful decisions and avoid
decisions that cost us more than what we bargained for.
Special!
People often save their new dress for a wedding anniversary or a birthday or some party. Some even preserve
their costly wine bottle for guests or keep aside the unique cutlery for them. A guest coming to your
home and appreciating them is an uncertain event and moreover, it shows that we live life for the sake
of appearances. We are that special person who needs great hospitality, not distant relatives.
And preserving it for a future date shows how naive we are. Death comes unannounced and often in a rush.
Today could be the last day we draw breath. To press this further, we cannot carry material things into
the afterlife world. Our ancestors believed it and kept treasures in graves which only led to the looting of dead bodies,
satisfying thieves’ greed but not of our grandfathers and mothers.
Why Courage Matters?
Courage is the primary virtue that defines your direction and depth in life. Without it, dreams silently go to graves without doing much. All the great people apart from being smart, and generous also had this stellar trait. From military accomplishments to standing for fellow brethren and taking that giant leap into entrepreneurship, courage is the glue that holds them all.
However, courage is not some special virtue that only 1% has, we all can cultivate. In that matter, it is more democratic than all other virtues out there. All you need rock-solid intention and a bit of craziness to go for special adventures, and regular practice like any skill. That’s it. after that, you are unstoppable and unbreakable.
Hence to go grab that greatness that waits around the corner, we need to exactly understand why it matters a lot in our life.
- 1)Virtuous Living.
We all know that at the end game, words don’t matter but deeds do. And deeds demand a steel frame of courage. Most importantly to do virtuous acts.
Whether it is standing up for a colleague who faced sexual harassment or exposing corporate scandals or marching on the streets for the right thing, we need courage. Moral heroism needs a hell of a lot of courage. I understood when I exposed an exam scam that was running at the university. So many doubts and balance sheet morals came up, yet looking back my conscience is clean with that noble act.
That’s why Maya Angelou says — “Courage is the most important of all virtues because, without courage, you cannot practice any other virtue consistently.”
In fact, Justice, temperance, wisdom, the other virtues we deem as cardinal cannot move a needle without this one.
- 2)Controlling Fear.
Do you remember that feeling that passes down your spine when you are about to give that stellar presentation? That’s Phobos for you. Courage does not take away that, let me tell you without any suspense. But it lets you act despite the fear. Once I had public speaking fear so much so that I use to sweat like I had run a marathon. Even now, it brings some moths in the stomach yet with practice, patience, and courage I could overcome it. So can you.
Succumbing to your fears is a big obstacle. It holds you back and diverts your destiny. you will be stuck like a guy who lost a time machine to travel into the future. As Nightingale puts it — “How very little can be done under the spirit of fear.”
Hence cultivate courage so that fear does not stop you wherever you are. People give so many tips but trust me nothing works like the good old diligent practice. you need to take small acts of courage daily so that you build muscle that can show strength and hard-iron conviction. Here’s a quote from Ryan Holiday book — “Courage is Calling”
“Today, each of us receives our own call. To service. To take a risk. To challenge the status quo. To run toward while others run away. To rise above our own station. To do what people say is impossible.” Take that call right away.
- 3)Growth.
Every opportunity you ever had was a seed that harboured a leap into greatness. But we don’t see it that away. Isn’t it? In the present day, we have so many opportunities around us through the internet. You can be the next Joe Rogan as a podcaster, start your own Youtube channel or write for Medium that can give you enough dollars to live by. Yet we hold ourselves back. Why? so that a random stranger whom most likely you will never meet will say that your work was shitty? If we listen to that, the dream book/ company / whatever, will not come to fruition. Life will build a grave for you so no need to do that for yourself.
Coming out of comfort zone with courage now seems a cliche but it is not. And neither is it something that you need to do for some holy task. No, for every act you do in your life, demand something that matches your potential. Nothing less. Ginni Rometty, the IBM CEO puts it profoundly when she says —
“ Growth and comfort do not co-exist.” What a line!!!
Cultivate the courage to move ahead, empty of all the limiting thoughts that belittle you.
Define things
Since ultimately what we want out of any work we do or relationship we engage in is happiness. It’s better
to define what that happiness is and how it should be. Or what is so-called love or having courage?
It helps lower the unnecessary expectations that the mind will bring in when things happen the other way
than the expectation or when people “mistreat” you as such.
People often cling to the concept of “respect” without actually ever thinking about it. What is that
respect? Is it someone bowing to you or something crazy like that? Or What amount of money
will make you rich? so on and so forth.
5 Irresistible tips from Daniel Pink on Marketing, Sales and Persuasion.
Daniel Pink has seen it all. From being a speech writer to Vice President Al Gore to a Sales guru and world-class author of nearly half a dozen books. His TED talk on motivation is definitely a worthy one to remember for a long time. Apart from this, Daniel has good command over behavioral and social sciences which is just another perfect reason to learn from him about persuasion and the science of good selling.
- 1)Sales are everyone’s cup of tea.
Nearly everyone is into selling and persuasion if you think about it. Whether it’s convincing your boss about your idea or if you are a teacher then you are persuading your students to stay on the course or if you’re a blogger like me, then you’re into catchy titles so that people read it.
“People spend nearly 40% of their work time on something akin to persuasion, influencing, convincing.”—Daniel Pink.
So mastering your sales skills really matters. Because you cannot push too much to scare the hell out or too little so that your idea doesn’t matter. And we are into sales every day not just that guy or woman in a suit to ring the bell.
- 2)Information Asymmetry is an illusion now.
The new world now is—Information parity. People exactly know what model of car they want with engine power. And they read, watch videos on YouTube about what they want. Consider this, we all google about our disease, see medication and their common side effects and various alternatives to surgery and then go to doctor for treatment. That exactly shows what has changed now.
In other words, you cannot sell a rat when buyer asks for a sheep in this new digital-information age. What people want now from you is your wisdom that is pick out 1 from a 1000 choices that bombard them.
- 3)Find the common ground through attunement.
You need to be a perspective taker. Think through their lens and walk in their shoes. Empathy is very critical now. This is because when you understand their problem then we can tailor the product and become better persuader.
For instance, McDonalds and KFC unless understand food needs and problems of native cultures cannot sell. And MNC’s giving holidays and day-off on holidays in respect of native cultures is an example of good perspective taking.
And Power bossing over employees and brushing off their problems and issues in office isn’t going to work anymore. And even in business meetings he asks to keep aside an empty chair(considering hypothetical customer there) so that we always have customer driven strategies and ideas. That’s a cheap investment high value investment. Use it ASAP.
- 4)Persuasion should be personal.
Selling should be personal and empowering. Your product’s mission should be to improve people’s lives. And persuasion shouldn’t be used to scam people. That will hurt your long term prospects.
And one way to improve performance of employees is to make it very personal. Daniel gives an example in Israel where Radiologists have spend more time on patient’s report when a photograph was attached to it than on reports without photograph. This shows that when people know that their work really matters and they are easily persuaded to do quality work.
- 5)“Loss to you pitch”
Next time you want to sell that balloon blower or hair dryer or even a house. Tell people what they lose not what they gain. This idea is extremely useful and I’ve been using it ever since.
People pay attention when there’s a loss or pain around the corner. Persuade your manager by saying things like—
*If we do this, then sales drop by 60%
*If we hire that guy, then teamwork suffers.
*If we don’t buy this, then our power bill goes up by 12%
*If we don’t upgrade our software, then we lose valuable data like that Tom-Dick-Harry company.
Daniel makes sales a science and persuasion a philosophy. Very concrete and extremely practical. Dig more into his ideas and you won’t regret. His “To sell is human” is a good place to start.
Patience
In the long run, we need to accept that things always take more time than we expected. People
will always say mean things, mostly because they are unconscious and have nothing in their minds
to keep the conversation worthy and positive. Health, despite all our efforts, will be hit
and it isn’t bad to be worried about.
The promotion we expected this year is pushed forward. The delivery guy who’s supposed to come today
phones you only to inform you that the parcel will arrive the day after tomorrow. The results of
our workout will not be happening anytime soon and worst is we get injuries.
The traffic will be more than what we anticipated and the smooth ride in our car is disrupted
by road rages and accidents.
The Pandemics will come, the economy will be hit and the unemployment rates will soar taking away
our precious little job. And in a million other scenarios, we cannot do anything except wait
and watch.
At best, we can over-prepare but go with the flow as someone has rightly said.
Thy Vox 